Why I Hate the Commissary

We live literally a mile from the country's largest commissary, where food shopping is tax free, cheap, and and it actually resembles a real grocery store (unlike that Whiting Field wannabe). That one was pretty gross and it kept weird hours, so I never could take advantage of the savings. The Winn Dixie in town was even worse, so eating out was a pretty good option at the time.

Anyway, back on topic. NAS Norfolk has a HUGE commissary full of all kinds of goodies that are actually somewhat organized (you really had to know where we moved from to appreciate that), but since it is the largest, it is also the most packed. Only military personnel and their families are allowed to shop there, so logic would tell you that people would generally be pretty cordial toward one another since we're all part of a unique community and yadda yadda yadda, but you would be wrong. I have had better experiences with the general public at Wal-mart.

First of all, because we are a unique community, there are many unique challenges a lot of dependents have to face when braving the military-only facilities. Husbands deploy a lot, and this leaves a disproportionate number of "single" mothers left to wrangle their kids while taking care of the family shopping. If the average American family has 2.5 children, the average military family has 4.5 children. I'm exaggerating but sadly, not by much. Every one of these moms has a gaggle of children trailing behind her, a shopping cart overflowing with goods, and is usually followed by another cart pushed by a 3 foot tall kid trying to navigate through the store. She's meanwhile breastfeeding as she absentmindedly crashes her cart into the back of your heel, yelling at her other 2 kids, and complaining that her miniature cart-pusher can't keep up and is therefore NOT getting to pick out a toy. You have to feel for her. I'm sure the stress of having that many kids and your husband on a ship is phenomenal, however, slamming your cart into someone's heel and not apologizing or acknowledging the pain you have inflicted on them is flat out unforgivable.

Second, there is almost always a child screaming bloody murder somewhere in the store. Not crying.... SCREAMING. Today my blood pressure hit dangerous levels as this child screamed and screamed while BOTH parents walked calmly through the store pretending like their kid wasn't irritating the hell out of the other 150 people there. This went on for 45 minutes. 45!! I'm a rational person. I understand that small children have meltdowns. If you're by yourself and obviously trying to pacify your kid but have no other option, I'm probably going to throw a knowing smile your way. If you have someone there who can take the child outside and deal with it and instead choose not to parent, I'm going to shoot you the stink eye. That phase of your life ended the moment you peed on a stick and two lines appeared.

Third, do you know how many people park their carts side by side in the aisles and refuse to let anyone pass while they read through nutrition labels or compare pricing? Are you kidding me? There is nothing worse than getting blocked in (there is ALWAYS someone behind you) 2 feet from the item you were after on the shelf, waiting 10 minutes while the person in front of you discusses the fiber content of ice cream with the person beside them who is also blocking the aisle. If you're so concerned about being healthy.... ice cream ain't it, sweetheart.

It really makes Wal-mart feel like Nordstrom's on days like this. Maybe I'll get lucky and snap a few gems like these.